please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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