No subtext here. People are naked.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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