Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Randomize
