Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Randomize