did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
