my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
