Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
That reminds me...we need to get swords
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
