I got chris browned last night
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
