More tranny stories later!
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
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