It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
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