12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Randomize
