I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
