cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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