oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
