who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
