life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Randomize
