What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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