I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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