I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize