Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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