I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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