oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
i may or may not be watching the land before time
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
My vagina just clenched in fear
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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