And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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