That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
These tits shall not be calmed
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
