that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
