I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
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You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
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I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
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