ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
There are leaves in my underwear?
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize