operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
wow bdsm is so cute
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
