Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
