Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize