you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
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