Your face is a jimmy john
just come out here and I will go home with you...
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
