so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
