last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Randomize
