were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.