yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Randomize