My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
