i would punch a child for taco bell
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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