party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
it's great music for shaving your balls
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Randomize