apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you made out with another girl for some wings
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize