fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize
