i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Randomize