But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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