Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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