Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize
