I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
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