and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
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