Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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