I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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