I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
